Unsavoury

There was a young Duchess of Bray,

Who, you may find it strange when I say,

In spite of her station,

And high education,

Would always spell cunt with a K.

There once was a pervert named Manny

Who stuck his long prick in his fanny.

What's this shouting about?

It seems he can't get it out!

He can't shit, he can't piss, it's uncanny!

There was a lady from Vanvaper

Who wiped her butt with brown paper;

The paper was thin,

Her fingers slipped in,

She no longer used that brown paper.

There once was a hacker named Ken

Who inherited a truckload of Yen,

So he built him some chicks

Of silicon chips,

And hasn't been heard of since then!

There was girl from Sri Lanka

Whose cunt was as big a tanker,

You could go for a swim

In the depth of her quim

And needed a lamppost to walk her.

There once was a fishmonger called Babs

Who sold cod, skate, place and dabs,

He had sex with me,

And caught my VD.

Now he's a purveyor of crabs.

There once was an artist named Saint

Who swallowed some samples of paint,

All shades of the spectrum,

Flowed out his rectum

With a colourful lack of restraint

There once was a young man named Dave

Who kept a dead whore in a cave,

It only had one tit,

And smelled like shit,

But imagine the money Dave saved!

Oh, did the air turn green,

When a fart came from the Queen.

The court sat aghast,

At the Royal blast,

But stood and sang; "God save the Queen!"

That snobbish surreadata.frame, Garsall,

Once did himself up in a parcel;

He addressed it 'Lord Garsall,

The Keep, Garsall Castle'

And mailed it first-class up his arsehole.