Bawdy

There was an old lady of Brewster

Who would mutter, whenever I gewster,

"You're losing the knack,

Or you're missing the crack,

'Cause it don't feel as good as it yewster."

Cleopatra's a cute little minx

With a sex life that's loaded with kinks

Marcus A. she would steer amid

The palms and Great pyramid

And they'd screw on the head of the sphinx.

There was a young woman named Rhoda

As sweet as a chocolate soda.

It was such a delight

To screw her at night

Then once more at dawn as a coda.

There was a sweet girl of Decatur

Who went to sea on a freighter.

She was screwed by the master

-An utter disaster-

But the crew all made up for it later.

There once lived a man in DC

Who with the intern did the naughty,

He refused to confess

But the proof's on the dress;

So he quit lying to us on T.V.

A lovely young lady from Lod

Thought children all came from God

But it wasn't the almighty

That lifted her nighty

It was Roger the lodger; the sod!

In the harem the lonely girl calls

To the eunuch outside on the walls

Come in here she cried

And the eunuch replied

I would but I ain't got the balls.

There was a young man from Lynn,

Whose prick was the size of a pin.

Said his girl with a laugh,

As she fondled his staff,

"This won't be much of a sin."

There was a young lady from Maine,

Who enjoyed copulating on a train.

Not once, I maintain,

But again and again,

And again and again and again.

There was a young lady named Rood,

Who was such an absolute prude

That she pulled down the blind

When changing her mind

Lest a curious eye should intrude.