Pedagogical
Furtive and mean
The limerick is furtive and mean.
You must keep her in close quarantine,
Else she sinks to the slums
And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.
Fourth line
There was a man from Australia
Who regarded his limericks as a failure
They used to be fine,
Until the fourth line
...
Line two
There was a man from Peru
Whose limericks ended on line 2
...
...
...
On John Ciardi
To make friends with the lumpish John Ciardi
Needs a spirit uncouth, rough, and hardy.
When in line for a bit
Of amusement and wit—
Did he get it? Why, no, he was tardy.
Callous and crude
The limerick is callous and crude,
It's language distressingly lewd;
It's not worth reading
By persons of breeding
It's for us vulgar and rude
Line three
There once was a fella from Dundee
Whose limericks always ended on line three
I don't know why
...
...
The limerick
The Limerick form's not complex
It's usually crude dealing mainly with sex,
It burgeons with virgins,
Full of female type urgins'
And all sorts of filthy effects.
John Smith Company
A man hired by John Smith and Co.
Loudly declared that he'd tho.
Men that he saw
Dumping dirt near his door
The drivers, therefore, didn't do.
Long novels
Our novels get longa and longa
Their language gets stronga and stronga
There's much to be said
For a life that is led
In illiterate places like Bonga.
An old man from Japan
There was an old man of Japan
Who could never get limericks to scan,
And when they asked him why,
He replied, with a sigh,
Well you see it's because I always try and get as many words in the last line as I possibly can.